


Missing Heaven

by gabrielleabelle



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Angst, F/M, Ficlet, Introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-14
Updated: 2009-11-14
Packaged: 2017-10-02 17:26:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gabrielleabelle/pseuds/gabrielleabelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set almost immediately after S6's <i>Dead Things</i> with Spike going to rest in his crypt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Missing Heaven

His eye was still swollen when he woke up.

Fucking bitch.

Hideous, purple bruises all over his face. She'd just left him. Demolished him and left.

He'd asked for it, though. Well, he'd asked for something. He wasn't sure if that was it, actually. That had been more than he'd bargained for.

Spike stretched as he rose from his bed. His muscles were still sore.

So much that he'd sacrificed for her. Everything. He'd give her his everything. Whatever she needed. He'd tried to be everything. And she just kept throwing it all back in his face. And spitting on him. How could it be possible to hate and love someone so much at the same time? The feelings shouldn't be mixing like that. It hurt his head, his stomach, his heart. Hell, it even hurt the gaping hole where his soul used to be.

The bottle caught his eye. It hadn't been there when he'd stumbled in to sleep off the beating. Spike snatched it up, inspecting the label. Jack Daniels. Probably the only brand she knew. There was a piece of paper lying beside it with a hastily written "Sorry" across it.

Spike sighed, opening the Jack and taking a swig. Played him like a damn teeter-totter. Back and forth. Up and down. Sometimes taking him all the way up to the sky, close to Heaven, itself. And other times...other times she ground him into the dirt, forcing him under.

Spike ripped her note to tiny pieces and went back to bed, bottle in hand. Those moments of Heaven weren't the comfort they used to be.


End file.
